You can't make this shit up- PHOTO EVIDENCE

So today I was hanging out at CVS. Not for fun- on an errand. I spent some time in the vitamin section looking for L- Cystiene. You know it's good for the skin. Then I hooked myself up with some pink nail clippers. They are wicked awesome, but not just because of the color. They are pink AND glittery. I shit you not. I moseyed on over to the skincare isle, thrilled with my unique drugstore find. I picked up some salicylic acid, I'm not ashamed- this climate change is hell on the pores. I walked up to the counter and I laughed. Like, out loud.

There at the counter, was a woman, probably 80 years old, wearing only a blue string bikini top, a baseball cap, and really short running shorts; the kind that show ass cheek- even on a 16 year old. Her leg skin, well probably all her skin but I didn't want to look, was covered with age spots and hung on her body like cheese melting on garlic bread- yes even with the brown bubbles. She was carrying two boxes of Rogaine. She set them on the counter, next to a pile of other boxes of Rogaine- pink, gold and silver boxes. The woman was buying CVS out of monoxydil!

Now the poor guy working the checkout was trying not to laugh but it was a wasted effort. He looked at me and I sorta thought he was gonna cry. He looked back at her, but seemed to be having a hard time figuring out where to look. She turned around to me, and I sorta lost my breath. There she was, in all hey glory. Yes, as I said before, she was wearing a bikini top. No, it was not a full coverage piece. I will warn you, this gets pretty graphic. Read the following at your own risk...

The woman was wearing a VERY skimpy top. Her breast flap was hanging out the bottom of the bikini. By hanging, I mean HANGING. It was like a car accident. I couldn't look away. My eyes moved of their own volition up her body. They didnt get far before they encountered, to my horror, nippleage. Yes, eighty year old areolae. I kinda wanted to throw up- partially because I knew it would make her leave. She took a step and the jiggle was enough to snap me out of it. I looked her in the eye, I'm telling you people, I had no control over my eyes. She was smiling, like,

"Ha, ha, you looked at my semi-naked body!"

I quickly looked toward to CVS checker man, who was pretty hot actually (call me CVS man), "Can I help who is next?"

I smiled, "I don't know if shes coming back or not."

He shook his head, as if to clear the image, "I hope to God she never comes back."

The second he scanned my clippers, she returned with another pair of Rogaine boxes and returned, without incident, to the haircare isle. I started to laugh again, but it was now uncontrollable and rather obvious. CVS man started to laugh too and I paid as fast as I could and burst out the door. I lost it. I knew it was irrational, but I couldnt help it. There was a girl doubled over outside. I thought she was going to throw up (not that my neighborhood is THAT bad, but you know...) Anyway, she wasn't puking, just laughing. She looked up and said to me, "I'm not even that confident at the beach!"

Fuck the beach. I'm not that confident in the shower.

uneventful... but the closing thoughts are mildly interesting

I'm sitting here in my hotel in Boston. It is 1:30 in the morning and I should really be sleeping. But what the hell, I'm not tired, and I must admit I'm feeling a bit lonely this evening. I watched a sad movie and I feel it is my obligation to take this time to wallow in the emotion...
Wallowing is finished now. I'm tired. Just a quick update. The Fourth was kinda a bust. I'm fine living alone, but actually being alone all the time gets a bit less cool.

Closing thoughts... Celine Dion is a fucking poser. Steven Tyler, while awesome, is very androgynous. FM is a sell-out, liar (you know who you are).

A good day

Well, today I went on a "Duck Tour". I thought it sounded corny, but it was actually pretty cool. You start out on an amphibious vehicle from WWII. We drove around the city looking at all the historic stuff. We also got to see the largest chunk of the Berlin wall in the US. Then they take you into the water for a cruise on the Charles River. and you get to see all the sights from there. The drivers takes on a persona, ours was a former birdwatcher who was in therapy because of an incident with a bird, a hawk and a hang-glider. Very odd. It was a good time though.

After that I went to Christopher Columbus Park again. I think I will spend a great deal of time there if I end up in Boston permanently. It is right on the ocean and it has a really cool water fountain thing for kids to run in. I keep thinking about my little niece or nephew-to-be and I want to bring them here. There is a great rose garden. It is just a beautiful place to hang out and read and watch people.

After that I went to Boston Common and Public Garden. The have a frog pond (kiddie pool) there also. Then there is the swan pond with tons of great folliage. I don't think everyone would be as impressed with it as I was, but it was so different from Laramie. Flowers and plants everywhere you look. Wildlife everywhere. People everywhere. Awesome.

From there I went to Cheers. Yes, the actual bar. I took the olbigatory picture of me in front of the sign. Good times my friends... good times.

On my way back to the subway, I came upon Arlington Street Church. It is a Unitarian Universalist church founded in 1729. It has been very well taken care of. It has 16 Tiffany stained glass windows. It also has a lot of history. It was the place where the US Constitution was ratified and where the UU religion was founded. It was also the place where the first same-sex wedding was performed in the US. Over all a pretty cool thing to stumble on while looking for the T.

I am feeling very comfortable on the public transportation system. I take the 134 bus to Wellington station and get on the Orange line subway. Once I get on the subway, I can find my way anywhere I want to go. I got this shit on lock.

Lastly, I had a kick ass dinner at Bertucci's. Ceasar salad, fettucine with shrimp and asparagus, and for desert- creme brule cheesecake. It was a good day.

Update from Beantown

I have started training at a second school. I work In Medford in the first half of the day and end up in Chestnut Hill (I think) for the evenings. I have been taking the "T" so I have been having quite a bit of fun with that. Probably more than a normal person would. I feel safe on it, as long as I don't touch much and use hand sanitizer. Everything in the train station is sticky and while I am told that it is simply the humidity (which hasn't dropped below 90 ince I arrived) I have a hard time believing that there isn't something nasty lurking on those handrails. Better safe than sorry I say.

I have learned that when riding on public transoportation one is better off wearing headphones, even if they aren't connected to anything, just leading into your briefcase. This allows you to zone out and pretend you don't hear the excruciatingly detailed cell phone conversation going on next to you. Also, it makes people less likely to talk to you, which, to my suprise, they do sometimes. Maybe it is because I, a midwesterner, inadvertantly make eye contact. Who knows. I'm getting better and I don't think I look like a tourist anymore. I really enjoy my "T" time.

Moving on...

Boston. I'm out here- I'm doing this. I feel lucky to have this chance and glad that I made this decision. However, the position I have found myself in, while exhilarating, proves to be somewhat more difficult than I had anticipated. At least tonight. I am living alone in a hotel. So far, I have met four people through work. By "met" I mean people that I will talk to again in some capacity. I have seen some other people at work, but they aren't people I can hang out with. Aside from the man who drives the hotel shuttle and the gang guy on the subway and the delivery guy from Alfredo's (who doesn't speak English) I really haven't made any contacts outside of work. For me, a rather social person, it is odd to be in such a big city and have no one. I must remember that I work about 12 hour days, six days a week (wow, I hadn't done the math until now) so it isn't like I have had much time to meet people. Also, I have been here only a week. Still, I crave the conversation and the phone, while appreciated, isn't the same.

Well, I'm tired and I have to work in the morning (I have the afternoon off!) so I should go. I miss you all and I would love to hear from you. I will call you as soon as I get a chance. I will write again with some stories about my adventures this weekend.

Best.

Living in Boston

Well, I've made the move. I am in Boston for the nexxt six weeks for training and probably after that. I love it here so far. And I really like the work, even though I am just training. I must say, it is hard to be away from everyone. I think I am going to go into the city next weekend. I just slept on my day off this weekend, so I think I'm almost over the jet lag. I will write again soon.

This just in...

Okay, so I have had that stomachache thing for about a week. People say its stress, but this is happy stress, not stressful stress, so I decided to look into it further. After some exhaustive research I have come to the conclusion that I am in Mountain Dew withdrawal. I tried drinking coffee, but that made it much worse. I just started drinking a Mountatin Dew, my first in a week, and I feel better already. Coincidence? I think not.

I just wanted to share my knowledge so others, if they are smart, may benefit. Best to those of you suffering through finals. It will be over soon.

That is all.

STOP THINKING SARA

Okay... so I know that the events of the next few weeks will not determine the quality of the rest of my life. I also know that no matter what happens, my life is going well just as it is. None of this is all that important, however, I tell myself that and I begin to imagine what will happen, in each scenario. For those of you in the know, there are a lot of scenarios here (A, B, C and 1, 2, 3, 4- two completely seperate conundrums) thus a lot of combinations. For those of you not in the know, why the hell do you care? A better question would be, why the hell do I care so much? At this point, what will be will be, and I honestly believe whatever happens will turn out well. I cannot stop thinking about it though. If scenario A or B occurs then scenario 1 would be ideal. If scenario C occurs, then scenario 1 may be a bit awkward, but still a good thing. Scenario 2, now that is a tricky one. no matter what comes with it (A, B, C) it could easily go either way. Scenario 3 is fits well with both A, B and C. It is the safest, but it sucks, so screw that. Scenario 4 isn't even really an option. I won't do that again (I don't think.) To sum it up: since I have no control over the letter scenarios, I will avoid thinking of them (ha! right!) I can control the number scenario and to be truthful, I have to say if I had to pick this very instant, I would choose scenario 1. This very second, sitting here in front of my computer, I choose scenario 1. Yes, I have decided.